"Our Tempestuous Day"
It all started at 8:34am when the alarm went off and I threw it across the toilet bowl. Time crossing the crapper. I stared up at the ceiling for a moment, dazed, wondering if I would throw up or scratch. Probably both. I did both.
Then I speculated on why it was exactly I'd had the bizarre combination of forethought - I'd set the alarm clock and placed it near me - and apparent idiocy - I'd done something to make me wake up there, but I couldn't recall what. The storm clouds were brewing again, and it smelled like oranges. My empty stomach rumbled over last nights bender. A fight with Maria - my fiance, was all I needed.
I left her in the tree ... I remember that. John said it was crass, but she had really made me mad. Wait a minute! That tree was tall! If it rains, I'll go out there and bring the ladder ..
[snore]
[snooze alarm goes off from behind the toilette bowl]
Screw them. Screw them all. If that whining snot John showed so much as a hair through my door I would take it off. I would take it all off.
That was how I spent a day, in the bathroom. I became very familiar with the bathroom - its processes, rhythms. I examined the wax seal of the toilet in detail. I listened to the water go on in all parts of the building.
But John showed up, not just one of his hairs, but all of them. Now my resolution would be tested, and if I could just ... just ... a quick scuttle to the toilette again - heave and scratch, scratch and heave, I was like a hobby horse. John came in and asked if I had any Diet Sprite and I told him no. When the room stopped spinning, we sat down in the living room and played on the playstation. I got high score 3 times. Marie fell out of the tree around dinnertime.
